Testy Area 51 (3 Viewers)

[Jack Briggs]

Oh, god, Thi, I hate those commercials!

 

[Vince H]

Testing ...one ...two....four?

 

[Mike Frezon]

Necronomicon, schnecronomicon.

 

[teapot2001]

Jack, I love how the man says "free" in those commercials!

~T

 

[george.Legeza]

A testing in need is a testing indeed.

 

[Steve Christou]

I had a haircut [sobs] goodbye hair! I no longer look like the abominable snowman, I'm now back to good ol' abominable Stevo.
I was thinking of having a mohawk cut, but I didn't want to scare my already jittery girly, yes my recent 'dishevelled yeti' look was not a big hit with the princess of evil, so off it came.

I hired you people to try to get a little track laid, not to jump around like a bunch of Kansas City faggots.
Mongo only pawn... in game of life.
You will be risking your lives, whilst I will be risking an almost-certain Academy Award nomination for the Best Supporting Actor.
Lili Von Shtupp: Here I stand, the goddess of desire / Set men on fire / I have this power. / Morning, noon, and night, it's dwink and dancing / Some quick womancing / And then a shower. / Stage door Johnnies constantly suwwound me / They always hound me, with one wequest. / Who can satisfy their lustful habits? / I'm not a wabbit! / I need some west.
Someone's gotta go back for a shit-load of dimes!

 

[Parker Clack]

Somebody's poisoned the water hole.

 

[Dheiner]

Huh-huh, naw, Mongo straight!

 

[Steve Christou]

TESTING TESTY POLLS TESTING
Is the glass, half full or half empty?
a)Half full
b)Half empty
c)Where?
If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?
a)No!
b)Maybe
c)Sending you a PM.
Can you hammer a six-inch spike through a board with your penis?
a)Hmmm [suspicious] I don't think so...
b)aaaargghh you sado bastard!!!
c)I have no penis
d)Sending you a PM.
MORE TESTY POLLS COMING SOON, AREN'T YOU LUCKY?

 

[Dheiner]

C

A

T

 

[Mike Frezon]

There's a snake in my boots.

 

[Parker Clack]

Now, we're gonna give you a fair trial, followed by a first class hangin'.

All I did was kiss the girl.

I think there's only a couple of guys up there and this asshole's one of them!

I don't tolerate this kind of thing. It's hard on the peace and hard on the furniture.

 

[Jack Briggs]

Thi: "...or it's FREEeee!"

The "Fr" and initial "e" annunciations are about an octave higher than the final "ee" sound. And his voice is high-pitched (almost a falsetto) at the "FREE," tailing off with the "eee." Yet you can almost hear the exclamation mark at the end.

 

[Mike Frezon]

When Chekov saw the long winter, he saw a winter bleak and dark and bereft of hope. Yet, we know that winter is just another step in the cycle of life. But standing here amongst the people of Punxsutawney and basking in the warmth of their hearths and hearts, I couldn't imagine a better fate than a long .. and lustrous winter.

--Phil Connors

 

[Steve Christou]

From Premiere Magazine...
Harry Potter vs Frodo Baggins - Rap-Off
Harry faces Frodo...
When I see a motherfuckin' hobbit I rob it
And cut him where it counts, like my name is Lorena Bobbitt
I'm representin' Gryffindor and Hogwarts
With a magic middle finger for you Tolkien sorts
I apparate from Azkaban to Diagon Alley
And rock my pointy blue Crip hat when I'm chillin' in Cali
You hippie hobbits spend all your time in the woods
While I live in a cupboard in the motherfuckin' hood
Freaky foot-tall Frodo, short as Dorf on Golf
And I been hearin' rumors 'bout your homeboy Gandalf
My big Quidditch balls you couldn't even juggle
I'm magic on the mike and you're MC Muggle. NIMBUS 2000, Y'ALL!
[Harry jumps onto a flying Lexus and flies off]
Frodo's Response...
Yo, you got some nerve to call yourself Harry
I been shaving' my feet since you was just a little dingleberry
Or Dumbledore - however its pronounced
Step into the shire, Copperfield/ You get bounced
Wannabe Siegfried and Roy/ With your vibrating broom toy
And don't think I ain't noticed you ain't such a little boy
I hear your voice crackin' like a fookin' goober, G
'Cause all of your spells can't fight against puberty
Losin' your cuteness/ Time will ravage your very soul, man
Just ask Fred Savage or Gary Coleman
Grow up, we'll pass the pipe and get you sorcerer-stoned
Till then, one ring to rule them all - and leave me alone, BEEYOTCH!
[Frodo places the Ring on his finger, twists it to disappear, doesn't disappear, looks uncomfortable for a few moments, and shuffles away]

 

[Dheiner]

Speaking of tests:
http://www.thespark.com/gendertest
They are 86% sure, in my case. I'm not sure how to interpret that.

 

[Julie K]

You come home to find Great Cthulhu sitting in your living room, eating Doritos and watching MTV. What do you say?

a) Nothing, but gibber incoherently.

b) Nothing, and hope he'll go away.

c) Nothing, but occasionally cough and look at your watch until he gets the message.

d) Nothing, but attempt to take pictures for the tabloids.

e) Attempt to betray your friends for untold power.

f) Attempt to betray your friends for kicks.

g) Attempt to betray your friends because they keep teasing you about your bulging eyes and weird skin condition.

h) Ask him out.

i) "What are you doing home so early?"

 

[Julie K]

They are 86% sure, in my case. I'm not sure how to interpret that.

Heh. They were 93% certain in my case.
But they were wrong
(Women prefer blue bedrooms - ick! Women choose bleeding to death over being lonely forever - ouch! Ok, so I did call their little test 'retarded'...)

 

[Jack Briggs]

Julie slips into delirium.

 

[Julie K]

Some might say I slipped into delirium a long, long time ago.