Funniest line in a movie?.... (1 Viewer)

[SteveJKo]

Good point Tim. I saw "What's Up Doc" not long after seeing "Love Story". To this day the final exchange between Ryan O'Neal's character, Howard, and Barbara Streisand's character, Judy, still sends me into a laughing fit.


Howard: "I'm sorry for all those things I said..."

Judy: "Don't you know, love means never having to say you're sorry." (She very dramatically bats her eyelashes)

Howard: "That's the studiest thing I ever heard."

Judy: "I know."

 

[Marianne]

Office Space (not exact quote):

"Your name's Michael Bolton, like the singer. Why don't you change it to Mike Bolton?"

"Why should I, he's the one who sucks."

 

[John_Lee]

[Cacophony of charges against the 'witch']

"She turned me into a newt . . "

[Baffled stares]

"I got better."

 

[MichaelD]

Also from Office Space

Peter:
So I was sitting in my cubicle today, and I realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that's on the worst day of my life.

 

[Tim Glover]

Austin Powers in Goldmember:

 

[Johnny Angell]

From Mash, the movie, after Hawkeye gives her a rough time

When I first saw that on its first run in a military theater, well, that may be the loudest audience response I've ever heard.

 

[Jeff Gatie]

Any one of a hundred lines from Slap Shot, especially Paul Newman's scene closing line to the stingy female owner of the team (way too un-PC to quote here) and this description of the biggest goons in the league, climaxing with the final introduction:


Here's a name for you nostalgia fans: Clarence "Screaming Buffalo" Swamptown. I'll never forget an exclusive interview in which Swamptown revealed that he calls his hockey stick the "Big Tomahawk," and he usually refers to the opposing players as "the little scalps".

Andre "Poodle" Lussier, defense. Andre, as you know, has been living in semi-seclusion in Northern Quebec ever since the unfortunate Denny Pratt tragedy.

And from Mile 40, Saskatchewan, where he now runs a donut shop, number 10, former penalty-minute record holder for the years 1960 to 1968 inclusive, Gilmore Tuttle.

Uh oh, hold the phone. This young man has had a very trying rookie season, with the litigation, the notoriety, his subsequent deportation to Canada and that country's refusal to accept him, I guess that's more than most 21-year-olds can handle. Number six, Ogie Oglethorpe.


If you are interested, here's a link to a few more:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0076723/quotes

 

[Nicholas Vargo]

Also from M*A*S*H the Movie, and as said by Duke Forrest:

"Now colonial, if fair is fair, if I screw Hot Lips and punch Hawkeye, then can I go home?"

Call me insane, but I find that line hysterical.

 

[Shane Harg]

Four words:

"Is that hair gel?"

 

[Ocean Phoenix]

It's not a comedy, but no movie has ever made me laugh as hard as "Glengarry Glen Ross" did when Al Pacino snapped and mercilessly, relentlessly launched an immortal tidal wave of verbal abuse on Kevin Spacey at the end.

"You just cost me six thousand dollars. SIX THOUSAND DOLLARS and one Cadillac..."

 

[TravisR]

It probably doesn't translate well to text but one line that has stuck with me as absolutely hilarious is from Broken Arrow when Howie Long says "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!" after John Travolta arms a nuclear bomb. I don't remember one thing about that movie other than that line but every time I think of that line and Howie's limited range as an actor, I giggle like a school girl.

 

[KurtEP]

Airplane Oh stewardess, I speak jive.

The Fifth Element

Korben Dallas: We need to find the leader, Mangalores won't fight without the leader.
Mangalore Send someone to negotiate.
Kid We're sending somebody in to negotiate!
Dallas Walks in and shoots the Manglore between the eyes:
Korben Dallas: Anybody else want to negotiate?
Kid:where did he learn to negotiate like that?
President:I wonder.

Unfortunately, everytime negotiation comes up in school now, this goes through my head for a few days.

 

[Lucia Duran]

It's in my signature! It may not be the funniest line ever, but I crack up every time I hear it. There are actually quite a few from that movie that make me laugh out loud.

 

[Joel Stein]

RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD- "Send more paramedics."
JACKIE BROWN- "AK-47. The very best there is. When you absolutely, positively got to kill every motherfucker in the room, accept no substitutes."
GET SHORTY- "E.g., i.e., fuck you!"
A NIGHT AT THE OPERA-
Groucho: "It's all right, that's in every contract. That's what they call a sanity clause."
Chico: "You can't fool me! There ain't no Sanity Claus!"

 

[Tim Glover]

Really cool and fun thread. Enjoy reading these and re-reading them too.

 

[Adam Lenhardt]

Beavis and Butthead Do America:

 

[Stephen_L]

Didn't see any mention of Young Frankenstein in this list. Here are a couple of memorable song moments that kill me every time.

"Puttin' on the Ritz" as sung by Peter Boyles' creature
"Oh, sweet mystery of life at last I found you!" by Madeleine Kahn and Terry Garr

And from another favorite "Napoleon Dynamite"

"Tina you fat lard, come get some dinner"
"Pedro offers you his protection"
"But my lips hurt real bad!"

 

[Jerome Grate]

Blazing Saddles has one of my favorites
Scene during the sign in for villians

Gene: Oh boys look at what I got here
Cleavon: Hey where the white women at

 

[Seth=L]

Family Guy:

 

[jessieo]

Here's a classic:

Forrest Gump is running his 'marathon'. A hippie, slightly behind him, tries to catch up and says, " Oh man, I just stepped in dog s..t!

Forrest Gump replies, "It HAPPENS....