First Date: Do's & Dont's (Flowers?)

Discussion in 'After Hours Lounge (Off Topic)' started by Michael D. Bunting, Jun 18, 2004.

  1. Michael D. Bunting

    Michael D. Bunting Screenwriter

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    Okay,

    I divorced about 6-7 months ago and have recently begun dating again. I have went out on a few dates here and there over the past 3 or 4 months and everyone of them went fine.

    I think I'm doing everything that I'm supposed to be doing. I have a date this evening with someone who I have met over the internet (now, don't worry, she is not Russian!!! --- Sorry Blu!) via match.com

    We have chatted the past 3 weeks and we finally decided to meet tonight for the first time. We'll be meeting up and then going to a nice dinner in Tacoma, WA on the waterfront.

    The main reason I posted this is to get an opinion on whether I should bring along a nice little bouquet of flowers for her. What do I do here? I'm not talking Roses here - just a nice boquest of something "pretty".
    This is something I HAVE NOT DONE on most of my previous dates at all. In fact, I only did it one time for a date that had us attending the symphony orchestra in Seattle, so it was a special night.

    Flowers for tonight? Yeah or Neay?

    Any other advice for me?

    The girl I'm going out with tonight is 22 (I'm 30) and this will be the largest age difference that I will have ever experienced on a date, so I'm a little nervous about that..otherwise, I think everything will be fine.

    Would love to hear any pointers from you all out there...of course, I'll have to take these with a grain of salt, as it is Friday night and you guys are all at home surfing the HTF [​IMG] Just kidding....
     
  2. Rob Gardiner

    Rob Gardiner Cinematographer

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    Go get her, tiger. [​IMG]

    I say NO flowers on the first date. Save them for a special occasion.
     
  3. Chris Lanni

    Chris Lanni Stunt Coordinator

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    Oh man, now we see why it was/is that you have to sell all that stuff in the Hardware for sale thread. [​IMG]

    How have your conversations been going online? Have they been at all deep and emotional? If so I think flowers are exceptional.[​IMG]

    And by the way I am married and I am like just waiting for my wife to get home from work...Right?

    Gods Love
    chris

    P.S. Be yourself and have a blast![​IMG]
     
  4. Andrew Pratt

    Andrew Pratt Producer

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    Normally I'd say no but since you already sort of know her it might not be a bad idea...just keep it simple
     
  5. Mark Sherman

    Mark Sherman Supporting Actor

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    Play it cool no flowers but a nice Bottle of wine at the table would be nice.

    Go slow the wine nice dessert at a cafe then go for a walk. if its in the city there are tons of guys hawking flowers if so grab ONE for her. That way its a nice ending to a great night.


    hey it worked for me
     
  6. Moe Maishlish

    Moe Maishlish Supporting Actor

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    Haven't met her yet?

    NO FLOWERS!

    Internet/Phone chemistry is NOT the same as personal chemistry. There's a lot to be said about body language, facial expression, etc. If you had already met her in person, then you'd be able to guage the "in person" attraction level. As it is right now, you might not be sure if she actually looks like her picture (you have seen a picture, right?).

    In addition to that, when you bring a girl flowers you're kind of expressing an emotion, or a hope. Some women find flowers very romantic... but for the most part when they meet someone for the first time, the last impression you want to give them is that you've already got feelings for them. You might freak them out, scare them, whatever. Let them determine on their own (without any "bribery") that you're the man for them. This ain't TV or the movies, and all that mushy garbage is crap... especially when it comes to meeting people online.

    (For the record, I've met MANY women online... trust me on this one.)

    Save the flowers for the 3rd date (not the 2nd... 2nd is the buffer date, when you get together to make sure date #1 wasn't a fluke). [​IMG]

    Moe.
     
  7. Cees Alons

    Cees Alons Moderator
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    You've chatted along and now meeting for a first time and a dinner occasion? Nothing wrong with a nice modest set of flowers to give her when you meet. Don't make it "heavy-handed", though. Just give it with a smile, it's just to be meant as a nice gesture to honor the occasion now the two of you really meet. Not to do something "very special" or "very romantic".
    She's 22, so I don't think a bottle of wine is a present she's likely to appreciate.

    Did you swap photo's already? If not, make it all very casual and .. well, just pleasant. In that case you people don't even know if you're each other's mutual "type" or not.

    Make it all as normal and casual as you can. She may be a bit nervous about the situation too. Especially, because she's probably even less familiar with a situation like this than you are.

    Nice meet, nice chat, nice meal. That's the idea. Got to know each other a lit better and more personal (than through the Internet).

    May appear to be just a good evening. May appear to be more.


    Cees
     
  8. Michael D. Bunting

    Michael D. Bunting Screenwriter

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    Thanks for everyone's great advice and suggestions!

    We have exchanged photos...have talked on the phone numerous times..and we both seem to be really excited about tonight. So, I'm pretty sure I'll be stopping to pick up a little something (flowers) before we meet.



    Yes, this should sum up our night - thanks Cees!

    Allright - time to get ready [​IMG] Wish me luck!~
     
  9. Michael D. Bunting

    Michael D. Bunting Screenwriter

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    Thanks for everyone's great advice and suggestions!

    We have exchanged photos...have talked on the phone numerous times..and we both seem to be really excited about tonight. So, I'm pretty sure I'll be stopping to pick up a little something (flowers) before we meet.



    Yes, this should sum up our night - thanks Cees!

    Allright - time to get ready [​IMG] Wish me luck!~
     
  10. Jason Pancake

    Jason Pancake Stunt Coordinator

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  11. Jason Pancake

    Jason Pancake Stunt Coordinator

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  12. Michael D. Bunting

    Michael D. Bunting Screenwriter

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    Allright...I'm going to think on the "flowers" here for the next 45 minutes...

    ...it's a tough call...for me anyway...

    Her and I just chatted and we changed our meeting place to somewhere where I probably won't feel comfortable (local coffee shop) walking in with flowers in my hand, so I'm actually leaning towards NO FLOWERS right now...

    Again, thanks for all the advice/suggestions..better go, or else I'll need flowers to help apologize on why I was late for our date [​IMG]

    I'll let you all know how it goes...and that could be as early as a few hours from now [​IMG] or perhaps tomorrow [​IMG]
     
  13. Michael D. Bunting

    Michael D. Bunting Screenwriter

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    Allright...I'm going to think on the "flowers" here for the next 45 minutes...

    ...it's a tough call...for me anyway...

    Her and I just chatted and we changed our meeting place to somewhere where I probably won't feel comfortable (local coffee shop) walking in with flowers in my hand, so I'm actually leaning towards NO FLOWERS right now...

    Again, thanks for all the advice/suggestions..better go, or else I'll need flowers to help apologize on why I was late for our date [​IMG]

    I'll let you all know how it goes...and that could be as early as a few hours from now [​IMG] or perhaps tomorrow [​IMG]
     
  14. Chris Lanni

    Chris Lanni Stunt Coordinator

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    OK...If you give flowers and the date works out great then I voted for that. If the date enters the mausoleum never to be seen again then that is not the way I voted. [​IMG]

    No matter what happens if the date works for the best then it was my idea[​IMG] [​IMG]

    Uhh...Right?[​IMG] [​IMG]

    Gods Love
    chris

    Seriously though, just have a relaxing time with her.
     
  15. Chris Lanni

    Chris Lanni Stunt Coordinator

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    OK...If you give flowers and the date works out great then I voted for that. If the date enters the mausoleum never to be seen again then that is not the way I voted. [​IMG]

    No matter what happens if the date works for the best then it was my idea[​IMG] [​IMG]

    Uhh...Right?[​IMG] [​IMG]

    Gods Love
    chris

    Seriously though, just have a relaxing time with her.
     
  16. Greg_R

    Greg_R Screenwriter

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    But would you classify this as a first date )in terms of the Doc's advice)? They have had lengthy contact before tonight. However, I would say nay on the flowers (you're already buying her dinner).
     
  17. Greg_R

    Greg_R Screenwriter

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    But would you classify this as a first date )in terms of the Doc's advice)? They have had lengthy contact before tonight. However, I would say nay on the flowers (you're already buying her dinner).
     
  18. Pamela

    Pamela Supporting Actor

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    My vote is no flowers. Lengthy contact doesn't mean diddly squat until you meet face to face. Only then will you know if you click. If the first date goes well, then by all means, give her flowers on a subsequent date.
     
  19. Pamela

    Pamela Supporting Actor

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    My vote is no flowers. Lengthy contact doesn't mean diddly squat until you meet face to face. Only then will you know if you click. If the first date goes well, then by all means, give her flowers on a subsequent date.
     
  20. Shane Martin

    Shane Martin Producer

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    No flowers until the 2nd date is the way I'd go but if you take the same car I'd open the door for her and stuff and act like a gentleman [​IMG]
     

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