Culture clash - middle eastern coworker (1 Viewer)

[Chu Gai]

I was a very cute baby...a real babe magnet.

 

[Scott L]

Mark, I have no flippin clue why she'd associate your boy with being weak!? He looks perfect.

 

[Mark Dill]

I guess she's just nuts with a side order of rude - good combo, huh?

By the way, these are the EXACT same pictures she was looking at right before she went off on her little "weak" rant.

 

[Patrick Sun]

So, whose side of the family has the blonde hair?

 

[Holadem]

Can't see the kid, it's blocked at work.

--
H

 

[Mark Dill]

Heh, neither - my hair was the exact same as his as a kid - it started to darken when I was around 5 yrs old. I'm sure his will do the same.

 

[Kevin M]

Looks like a perfectly normal kid to me......are we sure she isn't being racist & not merely rude or nuts?

 

[Mark Dill]

There is probably some unintentional racism behind her comments - this is what I was trying to figure out.

If this were intentional racism then I would find it pretty funny. Something like... "Look at the weakling infidel child with the white devil's hair and the evil demon-light eyes! He is so weak compared to our robust little Mohammed, and all of his brothers, also named Mohammed!"

 

[Peter-PP]

It is clearly a culture clash. I'm very familiar with the Pakistani culure, yes their national language is Urdu and not Hindi, similar but not the same. Hindi is the national language of India. Saying "Oh you have gained weight, you look so FAT now or you have lost weight, you're so SKINNY!" in their culture is normal and nobody gets offended, the same way she commented on your kid's photo. You can politely tell her that her comment is considered rude here in the US with a smile and just move on.

 

[Adil M]

Kid looks normal to "me." I would not really go overly out of my way to understand the opinion of another. You have worked w/ her for some time, I am sure your judgement on her is pretty much in place. She sounds rude to me. Just call her kids fat next time you see them.

Indians and Pakistanis not getting along is a generational thing (based on some horrifying events during the partition) that is dying especially for those born outside of those countries. Her doing this to other Indians is silly but not surprising as Chu pointed out.

In some cultures including the Pakistani one they do sometimes "underestimate" things to keep the "eyes" or "watchfulness" away.

In fact, the direct translation for weak is "cumzore."
This term is often used as a compliment to say someone is skinny. Relatives always say this to my sisters and me... ok they used to say it to me.

As for my hypothesis (which I think is fairly solid) it is solely based on observations of being Pakistani and having visited the area many times as a a youngster. I am sure there has been work done on infant mortality in 3rd world/poor countries and birth weight and later weight. If someone wants to give me a grant though I'd spend some time to get published .

Well.. after reading the above post by Mark, I don't think I am going to bother w/ anymore explanations.

 

[Mark Dill]

Dude, come on, that was a joke. It's how I imagine an Osama-type western-world hater would talk about my son. You can't seriously be upset by that.

 

[Mark Dill]

Thank you both for your insights, Peter and Adil. That is very helpful.

 

[BrettB]

Good looking kid.

I was blond as a kid as well, till about 4 or 5.

 

[Chu Gai]

I've only one thought on the comment but I'm not sure if it specifically applies. When my first child was born (birth weight 9lb 12 1/2 oz), his pediatrician was Indian. He constantly made references that he was gaining weight too quickly and that we should continue to simply feed him formula and not give in to adding something like rice to the bottle. He definitely preferred children who were on the thinner side so perhaps your co-worker is also of a like mind and it is this baby fat that is perceived as weak. Me, if she irks me that much, I'd just stay away from her and only deal with her on a professional level.

 

[Rob Gardiner]

Mark,

I wouldn't say your son looks weak, but I'm pretty sure I could take him. (You know, mano-a-mano, or is that mano-a-nino?)


This tells me that she may be as confused by your response, as you are by her comments. Maybe this is just a case of "what we have here is failure to communicate"?


Why don't you tell us a juicy Astrology story now?

 

[Jerry Almeida]

I'll join the nit-picking party, mano-a-mano translates to hand-to-hand, not man-to-man as so many people often mistake it for.

 

[Malcolm R]

Just call her an "ignorant slut" and avoid her from now on.

The kid looks just fine.

 

[Bry_DD]

i'm sure she meant something else like your son is small or thin. how does your coworker know your son is weak? did she saw your son try to do some push ups and couldn't? if now she's a dumbass aight..

 

[Bryan X]

I just looked at the pictures, Mark. Your son looks perfectly fine. You on the other hand look like a weak, sickly mother^^$&&@!

 

[Citizen87645]

LOL