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DVD Review Diamond Heist DVD Review (1 Viewer)

Matt Hough

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Matt Hough
Diamond Heist DVD Review

Released theatrically three years ago as Magic Boys, Robert Koltai and Eva Gardos’ caper dramedy has been generically renamed Diamond Heist for its 2015 DVD release. Amid the clutter and disarray of the storytelling and characters in this story pitting two rivals bent on one-upping each other, there are the makings of a decent movie, but with sometimes incoherent direction and a lack of viable motivations prevalent throughout, Diamond Heist is more frustrating than satisfying.



Studio: Other

Distributed By: N/A

Video Resolution and Encode: 480P/MPEG-2

Aspect Ratio: 2.35:1

Audio: English 5.1 DD

Subtitles: English

Rating: Not Rated

Run Time: 1 Hr. 34 Min.

Package Includes: DVD

Amaray case

Disc Type: DVD-5 (single layer)

Region: 1

Release Date: 03/24/2015

MSRP: $19.97




The Production Rating: 1.5/5

Former Chippendale dancer and now successful diamond smuggler Terence (Michael Madsen) uses his male strip club in London as a front for his diamond operations. Being a former dancer, however, he also enjoys a good show, so when two of his prime attractions are kidnapped before a planned meeting of his international buyers, he calls on his business manager “Bad News” Brown (Róbert Koltai) to find replacements. Terence’s malicious rival Jack Varga (Vinnie Jones) hits on the idea to take over Terence’s operation by installing two strippers of his own choosing and blackmailing Terence’s American diamond courier pilot Cherry Valentine (Jamelia) into working for him. But due to unforeseen occurrences, the two new strippers are mistakenly replaced by two hapless Hungarian grifters Zoli (Gyözö Szabó) and David (Csaba Pindroch) who know nothing about diamonds or stripping and are going to be futilely winging it once they get to London.

The screenplay by Ivo Marloh and Dénes Orosz and the direction by Róbert Koltai do rather miserable jobs in transitioning between all the various sequences in the film with wildly screaming women going mad for these male strippers (Magic Mike must have been a major influence on the construction of this story) and the diamond heist/betrayal plot which never quite makes much sense (especially some last minute revelations from Cherry). For comic relief between the serious scenes of crime unfolding and the two crime bosses trying to best each other, we have the comic subplots of the two clueless Hungarians attempting to brave the challenges of male stripping while the two men who were supposed to be the replacements (Ferenc Hujber, Sandor Nagy) make their own way to London and end up mistakenly at an S&M club at the mercy of some vicious masters and edgy clientele. The slapstick antics with the grifters isn’t milked nearly enough for all of the comic potential it contains (amusingly, the women go just as mad for these schlubby, below average gents as they do for the sculpted Adonises with their slick choreographed routines), and even at 94 minutes, the film seems padded and insubstantial.

Of the two English-as-a-first-language-speaking stars, Michael Madsen has by far the bigger role, but it’s Vinnie Jones whose imposing size and simmering fury continually catch the eye and rivet the attention. Madsen seems a bit erratic in his playing (no doubt the fault of the script which doesn’t provide great motivation for his actions and behaviors) with his threats seeming rather empty and facile. Jamelia does what she can with Cherry Valentine while Tamer Hassan as Terence’s right-hand man Ben has a very confusing role even donning drag for a birthday party sequence for no comprehensible reason (sequences like this seem to have been inserted willy-nilly into the movie to add color and oddity to the proceedings, and a gay bellhop played by Luke Brandon Field who develops a crush on one of the Hungarians likewise seems to have been added to contribute to the movie’s wacky tone, but it doesn’t go anywhere). Gyözö Szabó and Csaba Pindroch as the two ducks-out-of-water Hungarians do have sporadic moments of fun with their discomforting situation and give the movie whatever entertainment value it has.



Video Rating: 4/5  3D Rating: NA

The film’s theatrical 2.35:1 aspect ratio is faithfully represented in this transfer which has been anamorphically enhanced for widescreen televisions. Sharpness is good to very good throughout, and color is under control, even in the dimly lit strip club interiors where the skimpy costumes often feature bright neon colors. Black levels are only average, however, and contrast also seems to be somewhat inconsistent throughout. English subtitles used when the actors are speaking Hungarian are in white and are easy to read. The film has been divided into 8 chapters.



Audio Rating: 4/5

The Dolby Digital 5.1 sound mix uses the surround elements of design for the blaring music in the strip club and other sequences where music plays on the soundtrack. There is only average use of the surrounds for split effects. Dialogue has been placed in the center channel.



Special Features Rating: 0/5

Apart from a promo trailer for Breaking the Edge, there is no bonus material on the disc.



Overall Rating: 1.5/5

Trying to combine the male stripping of Magic Mike with a diamond caper crime story, Diamond Heist doesn’t do a very consistent job with either facet of its make-up. It’s a confused and not very satisfying comedy-drama that doesn’t really have a lot to recommend about it.


Reviewed By: Matt Hough


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